2 Corinthians 11-13 : weakness is strength

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Cor 12:9,10

What is cool, and humbling, is when God gets me to read a passage like the one for tonight - and I am thinking, yeah, yeah, I get that, profound, and then my mind starts drifting and I start thinking about other things, and I start getting all worked up about something - and there is a mental tap on the shoulder, a break, a halt, and suddenly the verse I just read comes back into my mind and I realise I have no idea, no understanding, no concept, no heart that matches that verse - that I really do not understand or know what the verse means cos I am not living it.

It happened just then - I was getting annoyed about a mate who I have been humble around, I have let my guard down and they know alot about me - possibly even more than I want them too - and they have seemed to be arrogantly presuming now to tell me of my faults, to question what I do - and I was just getting a bit angry about it, thinking, well look at Paul he got upset when the Corinthians took his humility and then ran him down and wrote him off, took advantage of the fact that Paul was humble around them to consider him as nothing.

But that is not what Paul is on about - quite the contrary - he has a true humility [I think, and yeah it is true, when I look at my humility I didn't really mean it, it was just an act, and I was not truely humble but proudly pretending to be humble] a humility that will boast in it's weaknesses cos the weakness comes from a heart that is focused on God, focused on giving all in service to God in service to others. A humility that does not claim position, because that position is due them so there is no need to claim it, a position that comes from God. A humility that recognises that when I am as an individual are weak, that is a good thing because then I am strong in my reliance on God and His power and that is true strength.

Instead I had a humility that wasn't, and when the person accepted that I was humble and treated me as a humble person, I, not being humble at all, but just pretending, got very upset. Who are they to judge me I thought, why should I be humble to you, if it just makes you proud - but of course I was the proud one, the arrogant one.

On another topic - I think it is extremely ironic that the two books of Corinthians are used by the charismatic churches to promote their emphasis on Spiritual gifts and the exercise of them and the way God;s strength and power are manifest in the lives of believers. These two books represent a damming indictment of just about everything any charismatic church [that I have been to] teach.

Like this passage - Paul's true strength is shown in his weaknesses cos it shows that his power comes not from himself, but from the grace of God - that to cope and succeed - depends not upon anything that Paul has or does - but upon the power of God. And even in measuring success and in demonstrating the true power he has - paul uses a very different perspective to any charismatic - or in fact most christians at all - that I know.

What anyone else dares to boast about--I am speaking as a fool--I also dare to boast about. Are they Hebrews? So am I. Are they Israelites? So am I. Are they Abraham's descendants? So am I. Are they servants of Christ? (I am out of my mind to talk like this.) I am more. I have worked much harder, been in prison more frequently, been flogged more severely, and been exposed to death again and again. Five times I received from the Jews the forty lashes minus one. Three times I was beaten with rods, once I was stoned, three times I was shipwrecked, I spent a night and a day in the open sea, I have been constantly on the move. I have been in danger from rivers, in danger from bandits, in danger from my own countrymen, in danger from Gentiles; in danger in the city, in danger in the country, in danger at sea; and in danger from false brothers. I have labored and toiled and have often gone without sleep; I have known hunger and thirst and have often gone without food; I have been cold and naked. Besides everything else, I face daily the pressure of my concern for all the churches. Who is weak, and I do not feel weak? Who is led into sin, and I do not inwardly burn? If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness. The God and Father of the Lord Jesus, who is to be praised forever, knows that I am not lying. In Damascus the governor under King Aretas had the city of the Damascenes guarded in order to arrest me. But I was lowered in a basket from a window in the wall and slipped through his hands.

Not a very glorious testimony really - shipwrecked, run out of town, naked, cold, laboured, toiled, hungry and thirsty - not very powerful - not very successful - not in the eyes of the world - but Paul didn't do those things for the worldly reasons he did it cos he loves God and loves God's people and wants to give his all for them - that is the sort of Heart I too long to have - a truely humble heart that will do anything it can for the people around it. Not a proud heart, arrogantly pretending to be humble.